"I'm not a penis," and other fun things

This weekend was a whirlwind wedding extravaganza. Corbin's debut as a ring bearer went as good as can be expected of a 2 year old boy. He protested the tuxedo vest until we caved and he just wore his white shirt, clip on tie, and jacket (no biggie); he left the ring pillow in the preparation room stating that he wanted mommy to carry it (which I refused as I was already carrying flowers); he walked down the aisle with his right arm bent and covering his mouth/nose when he realized close to 2oo people were looking at him; he sat quietly (like the proverbial calm before the storm) with Mema and Gradaddy on the front pew until the organ stopped and he conjured up bravery to explore....that's when it got interesting. Corbin casually pushed through the bride and groom and past pastor Claire and Father Don. He continued to do circles behind the pulpit with a wedding program in hand. When that didn't tickle his fancy any more, he came back down the steps, tugged on my dress, and handed me his empty fruit snacks wrapper. Then he asked if he could hold my bouquet to which I replied, "shhhh." He then sparred with me-"No, mama. I no shush right now. I don't wanna shush. You no say that to me."
Ah ,lovely. He was quiet for the remainder of the ceremony and then very cooly walked behind me and Matt in the procession. Everybody swore he was "just the cutest, most entertaining thing." I probably had a mortified facial expression throughout the ceremony. It was BEAUTIFUL though and Kelly Weeks was an amazingly, astoundingly gorgeous bride. Her ivory dress contrasted perfectly with our black bridesmaids dresses. The reception was fantastic. The food was savory, the cake was tasty, the photo booth was FUN, and the dancing was just downright needed! Overall, we are completely wiped out. Finally, I'd like to say that Corbin announced to me in the truck on the way home: "Mama, I'm not a penis. I'm a human (pronounced hoooman)." Wow.